y'know, a reaction like his would seem more closely linked to him being a nutjob than a liberal, don'tcha think? . . . like i know a few people whose reactions to things tend to be out of proportion to what the cultural norm would be, and while, yes, i'd assume most of 'em are probably liberal, it's not 'cuz i think there's a direct correlation, but only because i live in california and there's just a larger concentration of liberals here. . .

also, i was wondering (i really don't know as i've never tried a dating service) if there tends to be a noticably higher concentration of the societal fringe element when it comes to dating services as i'd imagine they'd have a higher-than-average percentage of people using it as a last resort. . .

note that i'm not saying *you're* a psycho nutjob freak (of course i've never actually met you so i suppose it's possible you're some 50-year-old pedophile with a gut and a bud sitting in front of a packard bell in a trailer park), i'm just wondering if the fringe is more widely represented in places like match.com. . .

I had a leftie love for a while, but she was actually insane regardless of her beliefs, although I suspect that the two were related.

This is pretty simple. Cricket bat to the base of the skull. Anyone whom treats you like that again, leme know. I'd like to- er, inform them of the error of their ways.

"i'm just wondering if the fringe is more widely represented in places like match.com"

Living in a state where being right-of-center is considered to be on the "fringe", I believe that is what Moxie is counting on.

If the online methods don't work, I guess she could try looking around at local church singles groups. Hopefully, they all won't be intolerant, proselytizing assholes.

99.9% of the women I've dated throughout my life just happened to be conservatives. This from someone born and raised in Manhattan, so it was not as if I was tripping over them on every street corner. Kismet, luck, animule magnetism, dunno. Traveling extensively saw the same returns. Guess opposites really don't attract.

It would appear to me that it may have been a purposeful act on his part to set up a date with a conservative in order to get his kicks walking out on you and then writing that diatribe in an attempt to hurt your feelings. I guess killing babies just doesn't give the same kicks it used to and now libshits must resort to such sophmoric behavior to get their rocks off.

Aloha

I gotta go with og here... I don't know who this a-hole is and I don't even know you much Moxie, but I do know you're a woman and I assume this guy has male genitalia (although it can no doubt hardly be considered as such) so for him to say or write those kinds of things to you - - I’d love to bust him in the face. The idea that it’s okay to assail a woman verbally or otherwise in such a way irks me to the bone. I wish I could avenge you for such an indignity.

Yes, I think there are more lunatic fringe characters on these dating sites than you'd meet at say, your office or through a church group. But when you have the sort of job I have, it's one of few options.

Regarding the "he did this intentionally" theories -- I'd have to say that is unlikely. Besides not knowing I was conservative, he seemed mentally incapable of formulating such a devious plan. It was hard enough for him to form and speak a full sentence.

Jesus Christ. I've never wanted to pound someone's face into a pulp so badly in my life.

Moxie,

If you are ever in Florida let me know :)

Will happily spring for dinner.

Another conservative.

E-Harmony.com sucks. That is all.

My wife is a "nature cookie/lib", I'm a little to the right of Gengis Khan. We each have issues that we are passionate about. We don't discuss those very often because we know neither will convince/convert the other. We do agree not to actively subvert the others hot-button issues with contrary donations. I stay out of reproductive rights, she stays out of Second Amendment. Worked for 16 years so far.

Wow, I can't believe that you tried to meet a guy through one of those screwy on-line dating rip-offs. I'm registered with a couple of them, but only on the off chance I might reconnect with people from the past through them. You can't believe half the things people say on those things, including, by the way, the things I say on them.

Besides, you need a liberal guy. Haven't you heard that old saying that oppossites attract? By the way, when this guy said he was ultra-conservative, he was probably not referring to politics,he was probably trying to put himself across as a person who believed in old fashioned, traditional relationships, blah, blah, blah.

Remember-not half of what they say.

Okay, I read his rant and I think I see what the problem was, at least in part. Aren't you like close to twenty years younger than this guy? And despite what he said, you're obviously intelligent, and that's something he can't deal with. It's likely that he has it in his head that conservative women are the kind that stay home all day, clean house, cook, have babies, ergo, lots of sex, and devote their time to trying to please their man. That's what he was after, and it didn't take him long to figure out you weren't quite as empty headed and shallow as he considers conservaive women to be, and he just couldn't deal with it.

What a fucking loser.

Wow, I can't believe that you tried to meet a guy through one of those screwy on-line dating rip-offs.

Well, when YOU have job that requires you to deal with only A)models or B)no one, then perhaps you'll understand my motivation.

In general, I'm not that interested in dating, to be honest. Dating and marriage both seem like a recipe for divorce and disaster.

That's true. But the problem is in trying to meet somebody. When somebody sets out to meet mr or miss right they automatically shroud themselves in the illussion they want the person to see, and the other party does likewise. It's just natural to do that. A lot better when you meet somebody just on the spur of the moment, it's too all of a sudden to put up those kinds of pretenses that are in reality barriers to really getting to know a person, and that person getting to know you. Thus, the feelings that develop in a more spontaneous relationship are more likely to be genuine.

As for models, all I can say to that is by way of paraphrasing something I know a lot of women tell their daughters. "It's just as easy to fall in love with a good looking person as it is a plain one."

Fine, fine. 99% of the models I work with are women. And I like men.

Anyway, you guys know I've posted more recently, right? If you use Firefox, you have to hit control-refresh.

Some of us only catch up here every few days, I guess. After reading your post, I just checked out Match on my long-dormant account, and remembered again why I let it go dark.

Searching on the basic criteria (age range, body type prefs, no kids, nonsmoker, occasional/regular drinker), limiting the distance to within 15 miles of where I live (SF) and checking the "conservative" and "ultra conservative" boxes yielded me a grand total of about a dozen results. Half of those I didn't find attractive; of the remainder, half described themselves as very religious (including the one who was wearing a see-through T-shirt and no bra in her main photo), which is going to be an incompatibility for me. Three potential matches doesn't really seem worth the subscription fee.

For some reason, a lot of so-called "liberals" seem to think it is perfectly acceptable to tee off on conservatives. It appears to me that at least some of them are doing this to minimize the cognitive dissonance from their own authoritarian tendencies. I find this deeply distressing.

A co-worker drives a Volvo. When he had "W '04" stickers on it, he got a lot of very hostile reactions from other drivers. I'm guessing they couldn't wrap their minds around a conservative driving a Volvo.

Hey Mox, maybe he thought that this super hot bitch is way outta my leaque. Gotta come up with something fast before I suffer some pre-e.

Dating and marriage both seem like a recipe for divorce and disaster.

I agree.

Judging by the quality of his spelling, grammar and syntax, he obviously didn't discover his left-leaning tendencies at any college or university anywhere in the English-speaking world.

Possibly, there are a few places still specialising in pidgin English - Papua-New Guinea, perhaps, or that new correspondence job in Burkina Faso - but I suspect I might be on the wrong track there as most people can understand pidgin, particularly if they concentrate.

Or at 42, could it simply be early-onset Alzheimer's? Either way, and regardless of your diverse political views, leaving you at the restaurant makes him a cad of the highest order, and one who needs comeuppance. He could at least have stayed there and argued with you all night.

You are indeed well rid of the man.

I freelance commercial art, graphic design, and the like, as well as work in fine arts, so most of my social circle--if I have such a thing given the time I spend in my studio or hunched over my keyboard--consists of far-left-leaning artsy types. Many of the people I count as friends are liberals, and most of the women I've dated/continue to date are liberals. How do I do it? I don't hide my conservative beliefs any more than I hide my religious faith, but I don't wear it on my sleeve, either--nor do I seek out argument, knowing most of my liberal acquaintances seek affirmation, not reasoned debate. If pressed, I tell friends (and romantic interests) that I believe in objective truth, that all of my political views and positions on the issues are carefully considered, and that while I almost always vote straight-ticket Republican, I would vote for Democratic candidate if I genuinely thought that candidate superior in character and principle to his or her opponent--although Harry Truman isn't likely to rise from the dead anytime soon. That explanation generally satisfies both liberal friends and women I'm dating. That said, crazed whacko moonbats are another matter entirely. Of course, I'm talking about thoughtful people, not one-dimensional fanatics. Good people can disagree on any number of things.

Good luck with online dating services, Moxie. I quit doing them altogether after a few very bad experiences, but I have a friend who found his wife online and they're very happy together, so I know that it can work. Just not for me.